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I once got some plates that have animals wearing clothes as a gift, so sometimes I end up eating chicken parmesan off the face of a cute badger man in a collared shirt and suspenders

If your hole
Is my goal
There’s no toll
To ride my pole

tired: cuckold/bull

wired: daddy/Santa Claus

The aliens don’t talk to us because of all our fanfics where they put stuff in our butts

Babe you haven’t updated OnlyFans in months, is everything ok?

When you’re an adult, you can make choccy milk whenever you damn well please

Every time I accidentally learn something new about the long dead Juicero, it always ends up looking even worse than it already did. Like it had a phone app? And you had to sign into your Juicero account, and pair the app to the juicer with a stupid back-and-forth QR code scanning ritual like a digital flip fuck before you could even get some juice?

"but what if I wanted to fuck the bird!"
"we *all* want to fuck the bird"
"I wanna fuck the bird!"

I mean... they're not wrong...

It's like 2-degrees of separation to a furry in tech.

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(orc noises)