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Coyotes come in 3 varieties:
• Sleek, svelte and runway ready
• Dog
• Scrungly bastard fucker

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There’s some major sexual dimorphism here because Greek sphinxes have wings, but Egyptian ones are flightless! Like ants but in reverse

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Wikipedia has informed me that Greek sphinxes are typically female, and Egyptian sphinxes are typically male, or “androsphinxes”

I still think about the fucked up little shriveled up bird captioned "it hurts" that someone drew on Gartic Phone with Drawfee

“A lion’s paws and tail have I,
Asking riddles of passersby.
Human eyes and nose and ears,
I haven’t been laid in a thousand years.
What am I?”

“Uh, a horny sphinx?”

“Correct.”

“…”

“…”

Can’t believe I missed MLMonday and now it’s already WLWednesday

Levitation is for fools. Why would we want to levitate? Once you are up high, there is nowhere to go but down.

my favorite masculine trait is being warm and cuddly

"It is said: do not meddle in the affairs of wizards, for they are subtle and quick to anger."

"And it is also said," answered Frodo, "go not to the elves for counsel, for they will say both no and yes."

"I saved your fucking life you little twerp."

Greetings, traveler, may I surmise you’ve come to claim my secret prize?
If that is so, before you do, this question you must answer true.

(The secret prize is you have to fuck the sphinx)

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Ohhhhh heeeeelp my skin is soooooo dryyyyyyy I need a big man to rub moisturizer allllllll over meeeeeeee

I really do not care for the styling on the MX-5 from 2016 onwards. It went from a fun little coupe to “I’m a SPORTS CAR grrrrr! Angry headlights!”

WHY ARE YOU SLEEPING IT’S MORNING TIME TO GET UP! OYEEEEE OOYEE OOYOYEEEEEEEE O OYYEEE!

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(orc noises)